That night was not pageant, but I was asked for three figures whom I would want to invite for dinner. I gamely answered Tom, Dick and Harry and that sent some people in the room snickering. Of course, I wasn't serious. I could have likewise readily uttered Ming-Fidel-Baby and, it would still be a joke.

I spent the next several hours pondering whom exactly merits my complete and undivided attention and interest, enough to send me into a frenzy of butterflies in the stomach and, if lucky, multiple orgasms without the slightest stimulation. I sort of caused myself stinging migraine trying to fit just three people in a cozy ambiance of good food and music. And so, I said, what the heck! Why don't I just have three dinners with different sets of people and theme, and topics of discussion.

Here's my list, as of today:

~ Historical people, Local version
1. I would like to find out from Kris Aquino's father how he would have played his role in the sickening and nauseating Kris-Joey affair. I'm sure he also has something to say to about the ugly and abysmal brand of broadcast journalism that ABS-CBN so wantonly displayed that time. But I will leave the KJ-Kris/Joey-Killjoy topic after a while and take on one that has given me the creeps for years already. I'll ask Ninoy, whatever happened to her sister Tessie, the senator? Was she born stupid or impeachment trials and senate sessions are special occasions?

2. With due respect to Lola Rosa, I'd also want her company over dinner. For those unfamiliar, Lola Rosa was the first Filipina who publicly rose and made known the atrocities done by Japanese soldiers to countless young Filipino women during the war who were made sex slaves servicing the Japanese army. I won't dwell on the gory details of those many nights they were numbed by hundreds of take-turning uncut men who would devour them like playthings. For the entire evening, Lola Rosa and I will have intelligent and animated discussion on parenting styles of Filipino couples. Specifically, we will try to come up with a list of those ways of parenting done during her time which need serious re-thinking today. Intelligent and brave that she is, I am sure she will agree with me that just because we were born into a certain parenting style doesn't mean that we should embrace that as the rightful way to raise children. I will find a way for her to evaluate and validate my theory that our parents do not have the monopoly of knowledge when it comes to parenting. I wonder what she has to say.

3. And in order to have an air of youth and adventure, I'll probably work hard to have infamous terrorist leader Abu Sabaya partake dinner with us. Is he really --- well, --- gay? Since there were a number of beauty products, mostly for the face, found in his bag at the time of his death, does that spill the beans on him? Or is it, by any chance, KFR (kidnap for ransom), his main job, has become unattractive money-wise so he does door-to-door selling of beauty products to supplement his income? Or is their group Abu Sayyaf an ultra-conservative "bevy" of discreet gay men who roam around the place masquerading as terrorists? I'll surely rib Abu Sabaya and find out the real score between him and Janjalani. I'm sure he has some juicy details to leave us all in locked jaws.

Next list: ~ Everyday people