Being guy is fun

It was noon but the sun was out which made the weather a bit more bearable. Although not exactly a San Francisco kind of weather, the mild breeze were a refreshing delight as I walked down Ayala Avenue heading to lunch. The slightly chilling wind drove away the noontime heat and, at the same time, helped dry sweaty armpits and groin. I noticed several people swing their arms a bit farther from their hips than usual or would undo a shirt button one gap below than normal.

That’s when I realized there’s one more huge reason why men are infinitely more privileged than women. This time, it’s no longer just about men being able to unzip and spill wherever and whenever they want. It’s now become a battle of shapes and sizes instead.

Some women, like some of us men, at times amusingly equate their worth and merit with sizes and shapes. They feel good when they rest their arms across their chests and feel something that’s firmly rested and fresh as a plump bun. Others retreat in a bit of self-pity and embarrassment when they realize that what they have feels more like a fatigued and lifeless accessory. A few refuse to be troubled and just go about their way not minding incredulous stares from some people who seemed unusually mystified if they’re ogling at real boobs or just oversized zits. No matter how women try to hide their “deficiencies” with water-filled condoms or push-up bras, it’s all there for the world to see. You can’t just harvest them one second and try to relocate them some place more discreet the next moment.

In the case of men, at least there’s a little more secrecy to it. One may not be exceptional down there, but at least you don’t unwittingly scream to the world and give the slightest clue. Everyone is still left wondering about the real score. Of course, they can always ask for foot sizes or measure the length of forefingers, but you can always argue and start citing the latest scientific studies disproving theories of dicks and feet and fingers being related one way or another.

It’s really fun being a guy!